The Boat Show Trot!

by boatguy Ed

“Let's go to the Naples Boat Show tomorrow,” Tangueray Tom said Friday night over his gin and tonic. “I'm feeling the need for a road trip!”

“Not much of a road trip. Why don't we wait for a month and do the Miami Boat show,” answered Commodore Jim. “Now that's a boat show!” We discussed it over lunch and then happy hour and finally decided to gather the odds and ends of the willing members and go to the boat show on Saturday.

Even “Evil Knievel Harry” wanted to come so we loaded his 'scooter' into the back of my truck and off we went. A total of eleven members including Harry arrived at the corner of Goodlette-Frank and the East Tamiami Trail (41) just after 11 am. We gathered around Harry's scooter and moved in unison through the entrance and inside the tent. As we entered the show several attendees commented on our matching blue windbreakers with the ''Dead End Canal Yacht Club” burgee over our hearts. A few members sported the club's tasteless graphic on the back of their jackets.

One yachty type stood aside, raised one eyebrow and pointed his nose into the air as we passed. That's Naples!

I had an ulterior motive for going to the show because my son was an exhibitor there promoting his TV show, Boater's Treasures. We passed the usual display of towing companies, condo marinas, boat lift makers, several charities, gadgets before arriving in front of my son standing next to a television set playing his show.

It was surreal to see him on screen and in person at the same time. The 'Dead End Canal Yacht Club” members razzed him pretty good and then they moved on. “I don't get this crowd, “ Chris said, “they move through here at a brisk walk with their heads swiveling around like a bobble-head doll. They couldn't absorb anything!”

“Maybe your next television venture should be a reality game show where you query them at the end of the aisle and give 'em a Million Bucks if they identify anything they passed!” I stayed with him for a short spell and caught up to the group at the other end of the tent.

“Harry got stuck in a soft spot,” reported 'Run-aground Ralph'. “We got him out but by the look of these grounds, Harry might be wise to purchase some of that towing insurance.” Ralph isn't known for his sense of humor but that was really funny. And he told it to all of our little group at least three times and he told the joke to everyone we knew at the show. It became less and less funny, very quickly.

While Harry stayed on the roadway, the rest of us wandered around looking at the boats. I found Tom Nichols at the Bonita Boat Center booth and attempted to talk to him but he was way to busy. That was a very good sign from the industry point of view.

A poignant indicator of the health of boating in Southwest Florida was the inclusion of Motor Homes, exotic cars and used boats at the show. That has never happened before in all my 26 years of boating business in Southwest Florida. One would assume that Naples would be insulated from the effects of the down economy but obviously not.

We spent a whole hour and a half at the show. Harry got stuck again going back into the tent but he didn't need SeaTow. (Insert Chuckle Here) I said goodbye to my son and reminded him that I have done 29 years of boat shows and now it is his turn. Keep smiling kid!

After the show, we tried to gain entrance to the Naples Yacht Club but were denied because they still don't recognize our club. We even showed them the copy of our application, but no go. Only Commodore Jim was allowed to enter because he belongs to smome snooty club in lower Alabama. We went to Tin City. Jim soaked up the yachty atmosphere for a short while and then we headed for home base. This may be pretty boring stuff but you can't hit it out of the park every time!

Boatguy Ed ( boatguiEd@aol.com ) is the manufacturer of the worlds BEST anti-fouling bottom paint, www.supershipbottom.com. Former Producer, Director, Star and the guy who swept up on the "Boating Show" 1995 to 2000. Producer/Director/Editor of "Dining out SWFL" and "Boater's Treasures TV." TWEET me @boatguyed and a corresponding web site is http://www.boatingbyboatguyed.com/ ........ NEVER, EVER TRY TO BUY HIM A DRINK!

This blog/column is meant for educational purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. Void where prohibited. Some assembly required. Do not read while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Keep sending those great questions and comments to boatguiEd@aol.com.