Boating; Newbies

A potential member of the "Dead End Canal Yacht Club" came very near to destroying several neighbors boats a few days ago. He used his throttles to help him swing his new 36 foot power boat around to line it up with the slip. There was no tide, not much wind to speak of and no reason to hurry the turn but that is what he tried to do.

"Using throttles is like trying to console your wife after a bad hair cut. It's going to get out of control no matter how many times you say, 'it doesn't look that bad'," said Power Squadron Wayne. He should know because he teaches several seamanship courses. "We've all done it and it only takes once to convince us that it isn't right!"

The potential member and I say potential because just living on the right canal doesn't necessarily mean automatic inclusion into the club, was very apologetic about scaring his neighbors. "Dumbest thing I've seen in a long time," said Captain Crunch in a moment of inner reflection.

"We've all made a boo boo but he just kept making it," said Boston Bob twirling his hand imitating the Tilt-A-Whirl motion of the newbies boat as he tried to over correct the over correction. Around and around he went.

"I've got to get a bow thruster," shouted the newbie after he finally settled down and managed to get his almost brand new boat into his slip. The newbie's 'significant other' was so embarrassed that she put a towel over head when she got off the boat.

On our next happy hour outing we surprised the couple and they couldn't escape. "Hey it happens to a lot of new boaters," I said when I saw the extreme embarrassment on the young woman's face.

"I won't go out with him again," she said adamantly! So he owned the boat for a little over two weeks and his 'significant other' is so turned off by his actions that she won't set foot on it! What a shame but totally understandable because women aren't usually nautically inclined unless they grew up in a nautical household.

I'll never forget my wife's reaction one day during a sunfish sail when we were honeymooning in Ft. Lauderdale a zillion years ago. After a brisk ride down wind and a little lunch on a secluded beach I was her hero husband. Then we sailed up wind into a stiffening breeze. Halfway back she said to me, "Stop that!"

"Stop what," I asked! "Stop making the water splash up on me," she replied. I tried to convince her that I wasn't making the cool water splash on her. It was just part of sailing in a low free board open boat upwind that was making the water splash on her. Nothing I said made the slightest bit of difference I was quickly turning into the biggest louse on the planet!

I offered to put her ashore for a 3/4 of a mile walk along the beach to the resort but she wasn't talking to me by then so no rely was forthcoming. Out of desperation I switched places with her, handed her the tiller and calmly instructed her on how to steer the boat. I found out that she was a natural sailor on that day. She really enjoyed the rest of the sail especially when I winced at the splashing chilly water and she is still a good helms-woman today.

I told the little story to the newbies 'significant other' and she laughed a little but the fear was still in her eyes. "I hope you're not suggesting that I drive that damned boat?"

"That's exactly what I am suggesting only I think that both of you should take the two to five day (depending on experience) powerboat handling course at the Chapman's School of Seamanship in Stuart, Florida. They will make both of you proficient in docking, turning, backing down and a whole lot more. It ain't cheap but it is exactly what you both need," I said.

"Why should I go, he's the one that can't handle his own boat," she said while squirming around in her chair.

"Because now is the time to find out if you'll be walking the beach or staying on board and knowing the ins and outs will make you comfortable and knowledge might save both of your lives one day," I said. http://www.chapman.org/

Will they go? I really don't know because the cost is well over a thousand dollars for two but I believe if they go it will be the best boating money they'll ever spend. Boat Safe and keep reading my babbling!