Boating; Buffalo Wings

I am an unabashed, unrepentant 'Wing-aholic!' I am also a connoisseur of wings and you ask why I am qualified to claim that title, because I make the best wings, ever! Ever is a pretty big claim but I've worked at this for a long time. Why, because I love good, no, great Chicken wings and they are extremely hard to find on Fort Myers Beach.

One other factor is, I like my wings cheap, like $.50 or $.60 each but hardly ever $1 but exceptions do arise. I once paid $15 for six wings in the San Francisco airport but I was starving between flights. I wish I could tell you they were the best wings I've ever eaten but they weren't. About equal to the ones at 7/11 dried out by the heat lamp.

That brings us to my pet peeve. Dried out wings! Why don't they just serve Southern Pine whittled to look lie wings instead of the dried out tasteless wings that have been “precooked” and then cooked again. That is the way the 'Pukin' Pelican' does it. They cook ten pounds of wings until they are almost done and when an order comes in they toss them into the fryer and cook them all over again.

“You make to much out of this,” Mrs. boatguy always tells me when I grumble. By the way, I don't order their wings on 'Wing Night' anymore. When the 'Dead End Canal Yacht Club' travels the very short distance to the 'Pukin' Pelican', I've tried to trick the cooks by delaying my order but they all come out at the same time and I'm unhappy. I ask them to cook fresh wings but they take forever and are dried out as well.

When the attentive waitress asks if everything was all right, I try to hold my breath but can't, "They were overcooked!" She's young and poorly trained but she needs the job so instead of just blowing me off, she makes an excuse like "The regular cook quit last night and the new one was a dishwasher until today....." I know she had the best of intentions but that's not the excuse I hoped to hear. 

So, here is the secret to succulent, juicy but well cooked wings. First, marinate a dozen of them in a oil based marinade overnight. Second, fry the wings until they are turning light brown and then remove them from your home frier like a Fry Daddy. Place them in the microwave for a minute (plus?) on high. Wait until the oil is at it's max heat before re-inserting them. Most home fryers don't get hot enough to cook them in one shot. Wait until half of them float to the top and remove.

You will find that the exterior is crispy while the interior is hot and juicy. The microwave cooks the inside and they are done all the way through. If I am cooking large amounts I separate the drumsticks from the flats. If I'm cooking for the DECYC, I use my Turkey fryer! I prefer 'Sudden Death' Buffalo style sauce, how about you?

Boatguy Ed (boatguiEd@aol.com) is the manufacturer of the worlds BEST anti-fouling bottom paint,www.supershipbottom.com. TWEET me @boatguyed and a corresponding web site is http://www.boatingbyboatguyed.com/ ........ NEVER, EVER TRY TO BUY HIM A DRINK!

This blog/column is meant for educational purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. Void where prohibited. Some assembly required. Do not read while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment.