Super Bowl Prep


Super Bowl party preparation is underway at the Dead End Canal Yacht Club. Since we don't want to be on the roads or water after the game, The Rev is away visiting frozen relatives, we are going to watch the game at the clubhouse.
“We need a bigger television set in the Clubhouse,” said Punxy Phil. “I could bring my 60 incher?”

“The Bearded Clam breast-a-raunt is having a 100 wing take-out special,” said hard Luck Hannah. “A buck a piece with blue cheese and celery.”

“I think the 50 inch television is just fine in the small double wide garage. From the informal poll we took there probably won't be more than 20 of us,” I said. “Some of us are going to the Big Game Waterfront Bar and Grill for the free foamy Bud Light (until the keg is gone) while others are going to the Pukin' Pelican for their greasy pulled pork special. I'm in for the wing special!”

“Is Run-aground Ralph or Cap'n Crunch coming to the clubhouse,” asked Hannah. We explained that those two couldn't pass up free beer for anything. “Good, I'll never eat another fake Shrimp from Cambodia that they served.”

“I heard you had a problem last summer at the Shell Island picnic,” said Punxy.

“Damned near died from Iodine poisoning. I had no idea I was allergic to that shit! Those gooks raise them fake shrimp in fresh water ponds contaminated with their own shit and then have to add huge amounts of Iodine to the ponds before they harvest 'em, so they'll turn orange,” said Hannah angrily.

“No wonder they taste funny,” said Punxy.

“....And most restaurants in this area, the pink Shrimp capital of the world, serve fake Shrimp to the tourists. How obscene is that,” said Cleveland Jack.

“A woman asked the bartender at the Parrot Key if the peel and eat shrimp were fresh caught,” I said. “I was sitting next to her and her party and I heard the bartender say they were. I think the question was misunderstood. She asked the food runner the same question when he brought them out. He said he thought they were. She told him she was allergic and went into some kind of shock if they were Asian shrimp loaded with Iodine.”

“So they were local pink Shrimp,” Hannah asked.

“A few minutes later the food runner came running out and whisked the platter off the bar without explanation,” I said. The party left and I'm sure they won't return.


Boatguy Ed ( boatguiEd@aol.com ) is the manufacturer of the worlds BEST anti-fouling bottom paint, www.supershipbottom.com.... Former Producer, Director, Co-Star and the guy who swept up on the "Boating Show" 1995 to 2000. 

Producer/Director/Editor of "Dining out SWFL" and "Boater's Treasures TV." TWEET me @boatguyed and a corresponding web site is http://www.boatingbyboatguyed.com/ ........ NEVER, EVER TRY TO BUY HIM A DRINK!

This blog/column is meant for educational purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. Void where prohibited. Some assembly required. Do not read while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Keep sending those great questions and comments to boatguiEd@aol.com.

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