Cold Ass Weather

"This is terrible! Where did this weather come from," said Hard Luck Hannah from Texarkana.

"Oh posh, a few days of cold weather is payment for our beautiful weather the rest of the year," said the Reverend.

"This was a stupid idea to come to the Pukin' Pelican just to see some one I've never heard of," Hannah said, "I'm freezing and the curtains are down and the place is jammed. Why am I cold?"

“I agree with you Hannay,” said Hot Tamale.

I was feeling the breeze, too. I started looking around and noticed that some of the fans on the outside deck were blade-less. Then it hit me, they weren't blade-less, they were ON! Our table was directly beneath a whirling fan hung from the ceiling.

My problem solving brain engaged and I looked for a way to turn them off. There weren't pull strings visible so I assumed there was one central switch that controlled them. “Anyone see Joe?”

“What are you talking,” said Hottie. “They fired Joe dee manager.”

“Then look for Dexter (assistant manager). He wears a red shirt.” Just then our server came rushing past and we, in unison, shouted his name.

“What, what, what?” He sputtered in a harried manner. We asked if  Dexter  was working and he shook his head. We asked if he knew how to turn off the fans and he said, “I'll get right on it.”

I was left a pile of money for the bill when the others left. The Reverend promised to come back for me once he emptied the 'Dead End Canal Yacht Club' livery. I didn't see the waiter again so I went to the bar.

After another beer he came by with the bad news inside a black folder. Classy, huh. What about the fans, I asked. He nodded enthusiastically while making change. When the Reverend called I walked past our former table and the new shivering patrons. The breeze was still there.

Who am I blaming. No one, well maybe the brainiac who fired Joe but with a new manager in training and a pinch hitting manager and no Dexter ? One can only hope the place comes up to speed eventually.

One thing is certain, I won't make friends with the new manager because they burn through them way to fast.

Boatguy Ed ( boatguiEd@aol.com ) is the manufacturer of the worlds BEST anti-fouling bottom paint, www.supershipbottom.com.... Former Producer, Director, Co-Star and the guy who swept up on the "Boating Show" 1995 to 2000. 

Producer/Director/Editor of "Dining out SWFL" and "Boater's Treasures TV." TWEET me @boatguyed and a corresponding web site is http://www.boatingbyboatguyed.com/ ........ NEVER, EVER TRY TO BUY HIM A DRINK!

This blog/column is meant for educational purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. Void where prohibited. Some assembly required. Do not read while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Keep sending those great questions and comments to boatguiEd@aol.com.