Not Drunk...Dead
"Geez, how drunk do you have to be to fall flat on your face like that," said Cleveland Jack as the Ambulance Medics worked on the 'drunk' in the doorway of the Pukin' Pelican.
"They aren't acting like he's drunk. Using the paddleboards on him twice," said Hard Luck Hanna.
We all swivled in our chairs to watch and it was quickly evident that the 'drunk' was in fact dead. "I knew these chairs would kill someone sooner or later," said Boston Bob.
"They're terribly uncomfortable but I hardly think they're deadly," said Hanna.
"I'll bet it was a blood clot," I said. "That's the way it hit me. Straight down without any attempt to break my fall!"
"He did a face plant. I know if he lives, he'll need a lot of Dentistry and maybe some plastic surgery," said Cleveland Jack.
When the medics gave up, they carted him away. "Who knew incredibly uncomfortable bar stools could cause blood clots but we sit on these way too many hours."
"I'ver complained a hundred times about how they cut off the circulation to patrons legs but they (management/owners) don't care as long as the cash register rings," I said.
"This might be a wake up call," Cleveland Jack said as he called the shaken bartender over for his check.
"Let's go to Matanzass. They have comfortable seats and a great view," said Hanna.
We left. The manager was almost in tears after Boston Bob called out the terrible seats as the probable cause for the death. "It wasn't the seats, it was his time...," he stammered.
"They aren't acting like he's drunk. Using the paddleboards on him twice," said Hard Luck Hanna.
We all swivled in our chairs to watch and it was quickly evident that the 'drunk' was in fact dead. "I knew these chairs would kill someone sooner or later," said Boston Bob.
"They're terribly uncomfortable but I hardly think they're deadly," said Hanna.
"I'll bet it was a blood clot," I said. "That's the way it hit me. Straight down without any attempt to break my fall!"
"He did a face plant. I know if he lives, he'll need a lot of Dentistry and maybe some plastic surgery," said Cleveland Jack.
When the medics gave up, they carted him away. "Who knew incredibly uncomfortable bar stools could cause blood clots but we sit on these way too many hours."
"I'ver complained a hundred times about how they cut off the circulation to patrons legs but they (management/owners) don't care as long as the cash register rings," I said.
"This might be a wake up call," Cleveland Jack said as he called the shaken bartender over for his check.
"Let's go to Matanzass. They have comfortable seats and a great view," said Hanna.
We left. The manager was almost in tears after Boston Bob called out the terrible seats as the probable cause for the death. "It wasn't the seats, it was his time...," he stammered.
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